In shadows deep, the fear takes hold
Of sharing truths, both timid and bold
Vulnerability, a daunting dance
A chance for love or a painful glance
The mind, a relentless enemy
Whispers doubts, sows uncertainty
“Am I a fool to bare my soul?
Or wise to let my feelings roll?”
But growth lies in the risks we take
In hearts exposed, we learn and make
Connections deep, both rare and true
A bond formed in vulnerability’s view
So, through the fear may cloud our sight
In sharing fear, we find our light
For in the darkness, seeds are sown
And from rejection, strength is grown
Growing up, I was always so afraid of being vulnerable and sharing how I feel. For me, that always came with ridicule and mockery. Part of parenting myself is allowing myself to be vulnerable with people. Logically, I know that’s what meant for me will be, and what’s not will not. It’s still hard, excruciatingly hard. But I grow from every situation and life gets better each time I work through something and heal. This poem comes from my fear of telling my ex I was stuck on him. Of wanting to see if we had something left. Please, everyone, if you're not interested, don't ghost someone. It takes a lot of "balls" to tell someone how you feel. When you ghost us, we are left with our thoughts. We overthink the situation, making up excuses for you as to why you can't just give us the closure we crave. Ghosting is actually a form of abuse. Yup, it is. But it also shows emotional immaturity; knowing someone is struggling and not giving them what they need to let go and move on. So, as I write this, I know I never want to feel that way again, and anyone that can make me feel that way, intentional or not, is not for me. One answer, "no," could've changed the entire course for me. We could have remained friends. It could have saved me a month of emotional misery while I was at the same time dealing with an unexpected death of a very close friend. It's been just another lesson that God, or the universe has thrown at me, to pay attention to my body. Because looking back now, my body was giving me warning signs long before we met for coffee. Listen to yourself!
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