Survivng

In the depths of the past, a pain untold

Screaming for help, a story to unfold

Called names, labeled “crazy,” a heavy load

Struggling to survive, on life’s rough road

The journey of healing, a process slow

Overcoming the darkness, a heart aglow

But not all find the light, the way to mend

Some lost souls, with wounds that never end

Prison walls, a harsh reality

Or death’s cold embrace, a finality

Repeating the cycle, the pain passed down

A legacy of hurt, a thorny crown

The passion for awareness, born from the pain

A voice to speak out, a hope to gain

To shine a light on the shadows deep

To offer a hand, a promise to keep

People don't want to work on themselves for several reasons. The biggest being the judgments and criticisms from society, loved ones, and the harsh reality of our own flaws. The road to recovery is not easy. It's not like, hey, I'm going to go to therapy a few times and I'll be cured. Therapy is hard work. It's emotional. You feel alone most of the time. To really, and I mean really work on yourself, you must recognize patterns within yourself that you don't like. Patterns that cause extreme guilt, but also patterns that cause extreme hurt. The process of healing and changing is not a straight line. It's a line that you think is going to go straight up, but there are curve balls. There are set backs. There are mistakes. The line acts more like a tornado than anything. There will be several times you want to give up and stop as life continues to throw crap your way. There will be times you will be in bed all day, sometimes two or more, (if it's much longer, that's normal, too) and there are times you know you got this. Times that you think nothing can affect you ever again. It's a whirlwind of emotions. You'll feel crazy, like you're going insane. But let me tell you something. It's worth it. To truly find yourself and become the person you want and are meant to be, the person you know you can be, is a level of tranquility and peace you will never want to lose.

This blog post shares my thoughts, my emotions, as they are. As time goes on, I'll feel comfortable to share more thoughts. We tend to hide our feelings and who we are because it's not acceptable, and often judge other people for being so open about it. This is how I slowly come fully out of my shell, become the very person I want to be, and raise awareness on the uniqueness of everyone. As long as you're not hurting anyone in anyway, there's nothing wrong with being yourself. There is no normal. There is only unique. Embrace it.

#Healing #Messy

#CPTSD

I've shared this video before, but it's my current obsession and fits well with this post.