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Writer's pictureHannah L

Butterfly

In the quiet moments, when the longing hits

I find myself lost in a sea of “What ifs”

I unfriended him, hoping to let go

But my heart still hopes, that he will show


I’ve spent decades waiting for his return

Holding on to a love that still burns

But new relationships knock on my door

I push them away, wanting him more


I know in my head, it’s time to move on

But my heart keeps singing the same old song

I’m working through the pain, trying to let go

But the hope lingers, that he’ll let me know


It’s hard to break free from a love so deep

But I know I deserve more than just a leap

So I’ll keep fighting the urge to hold on

And close my heart to a love that’s gone


The logical part of me knows it’s time

To embrace a new love, and let go of the old rhymes

But my heart still argues, and longs for his reply

I’ll keep working through it, until the tears run dry


It's as it states. I'm still struggling to let this man go. I love Mariah Carey and know the song, "Butterfly" well. It made me think of him. I unfriended him so that I could keep my mental-health and mind sane and to hopefully let him go once and for all. As I'm listening to the lyrics, I realize I let him go, and the song talks about the person coming back after you do so. Relating to the lyrics in music has been a lifesaver, but it also holds me back. Given he's not said a single word to me since I shared my feelings and unfriended him, I know he doesn't feel the same and I know that I'm holding on for other reasons. I was so sure I loved him all this time, but it was clearly just a trauma thing of some sort. At the moment those lyrics were sung, my heart jumped to, "Maybe he'll come back." I know I have work to do. It's just so hard to let something or someone go, that you truly believed with every bone in your body that you'd have in your life someday, the way you wanted.

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